So I have a friend who has known I’m a Sugar Daddy for quite a few years now. Every once in a while, he gets a little more curious. We go on double dates together, well my Sugar Baby and I go out with him and his date, and I always catch him eyeing her. I’m not at all jealous or suspicious of him. I just find it funny he’s never asked, "How the hell do I become a sugar daddy?"
I, personally, have been looking for private arrangements for twenty-five years and those I found, have been responsible for some of the best years of my life. I tell him this often as a way to try and coax the question out of him, but he still seems ashamed to ask. Frankly, I see no shame in the matter. After my wife passed away, I felt incredibly lonely and at a loss, but I could not bring myself to re-marry. We had a child who was in their teen years and I still had a few years left before retirement. A distraction was exactly what I needed. Something fun, something that would make me feel alive again.
So this one night I went out to a fine Italian restaurant with my friend (we’ll call him George) and my Sugar Baby (we’ll call her Sadie). He’s always been a very smooth talking man and ironically enough, it was my Sugar Baby who brought it up over the second glass of wine.
I looked over at him with a raised brow. ‘Yes, why not George?’ Was written all over my facial expression. He gave a laugh and hung his head. We’ve been going on these dates for several years now and I know he’s wanted to ask a couple of times about it, but just never knew how to bring it up.
Sadie, (who was my newest Sugar Baby) looked over at me with a smile as she told George that she was certain I would be happy to talk more about my experiences. I suggested we pay for the bill and I would be happy to fill him in on the matter another time, but Sadie, the curious mind that she was, wanted to hear my thoughts. So I covered the tab and we headed back to my place for a couple more drinks and some conversation.
Honestly, at this point almost everyone has heard the term Sugar Daddy, but a lot of people don’t understand what it means, precisely. That’s something not just George has been interested in knowing over the years of my experience. What is it that qualifies someone to be a Sugar Daddy? After twenty-five years, I would like to say that I have some experience in the field and can offer some insights on the matter if he’d just ask the questions.
The real truth, I’ve found, is that everyone comes to this lifestyle for a different reason so my experience may be completely different that someone else. For me, I wanted the company and companionship of someone without the strings that came with a traditional relationship. Looking for private arrangements ended up being the best decision I ever made.
I told him first of all, my most recent Sugar Baby came from a site called PrivateArrangements.com. It’s fairly new to the Online Sugar Daddy Dating pool of websites, and its interface is brilliantly designed and very simple to use. It boasts a wealthy community of Sugar Babies from all different walks of life. While there have been conversations I’ve had with a potential Sugar Baby that has not led to sealing the deal, as it were, I have never had a problem with the behaviors on this site, which is saying a lot. It’s where I found Sadie, who has been nothing short of a treat.
"About twenty years ago, there were ways to find a Sugar Baby if you knew where to go," I said over a sip of nice bourbon. "Now that everything is online, you’ll want to sign up for a couple of websites in order to get the same effect as you would if you were scouting the private clubs in your area. Often times, the free websites are a scam. It might look like a great deal, but it’s a perfect place for people to get to your wallets as it’s an investment-free platform."
Finally he started to open up.
Honestly, it was the best first question he could have asked.
I told him that before he even started looking for a private arrangement, he would have to decide whether or not he has the capacity to be a Sugar Daddy.
"If you have a pocket full of cash and only want someone to entertain your bed, then you are looking in the wrong place," I said. "A Sugar Daddy has to have more than just money. He has to have compassion and a real genuine interest in spoiling a woman for lack of better words."
As an example I shared with him was my experience with one Sugar Baby I had. She was impressively ambitious, but she didn’t have the funds or the connections to do what she wanted to do with her life yet. While we spent several evenings together on a typical sugar date, I eventually invited her to be a part of my work team when I was still working so that she could grow and learn. She has since then gone on to build her own company and we still keep in touch every now and then.
"When I started joining online communities for Sugar Daddies, I had found that many other Sugar Daddies had a similar experience," I told him and looked over to Sadie.
"For example," she spoke up, "I’m a dancer, but I don’t have the money to support myself and I’m still learning how to be professional and self representative. Frank here is teaching me a lot about how to talk the talk, so to speak."
George nodded and continued to listen intently. I told him, he’ll want to expect that the Sugar Baby he chooses might not only desire the money and nice clothing. For me, it was very appealing to find a Sugar Baby who wanted something more. It’s incredibly rewarding to be wanted for more than just what’s in your bank account, but to have your experience and expertise acknowledged as well.
I told him that the truth of the matter was that he had to have a certain personality type to really take advantage of the Sugar Bowl.
"A Sugar Baby wants a Sugar Daddy they can enjoy being around. If you want a pretty woman to listen to all of your work and personal woes, get a therapist." Was my blunt response, one that pulled a chuckle from both him and Sadie.
I’ve known George a long time, but there was no point in cutting corners. Everyone had their own reason for wanting to get involved in the Sugar Bowl and I wanted to give it to him straight. I told him that there are plenty of young ones out there for him to choose from and if he wanted someone to keep his bed warm at night and nothing further, get an escort.
"I’m not saying you’re that kind of man," I ended that point with. "I’m just saying that there is a large difference between escorts and Sugar babies."
"As a Sugar Daddy, you must be positive, charming, and fun," I said.
I told him that he had to be incredibly honest with himself when he’s thinking this through. Is he looking for a private arrangement to offload troubles in his current life and situation or is he doing it for the honest and genuine enjoyment of company and supporting a young woman?
"Personally, I love the feeling I get from making someone smile. I love being able to share my expertise with a young woman who has so much to give to the world. I enjoy the feeling of giving, and as a Sugar Daddy I believe that how big your heart is has to be equal to how big your wallet is."
The other important thing to consider, I told him, is whether or not he has the time to have a Sugar Baby. The best thing about private arrangements is that there isn't this expectation to be around one another all the time and divulge every last detail about one another to each other. It’s expected that you’re both are ambitious and busy people and if the first date has gone well you'll likely end up negotiating both what one another needs and also the amount of time spent with one another.
In that regards, Private arrangements give both parties the freedom to be completely open with one another about their wants and needs. If there is anything that is brought up during the negotiation, which does not appeal to the other side and cannot be negotiated with, then you simply move on. Since the pool of people is so large, especially since the age of online dating has boomed, there shouldn't be any problem finding someone that fits your needs exactly.